The solution was the wonderful hospitality house that is connected to Spectrum Hospital downtown Grand Rapids, Michigan called the Renucci Hospitality House.   I can’t tell you what a wonderful service this Renucci House offers.  It was built in 1999 and helps to house family members of the hospital’s patients that are in need of having a place close by to sleep and rest.  It was designed to provide comfort and rest for the weary soul.  There is a small healing garden that is darling.  There is a playroom for young siblings or children of the hospital patient.  The staff is wonderful and caring, from the hosts to the cleaning crew.   There is a computer for the patient’s family members to use, a laundry facility, an exercise room…and quiet rooms for relaxing.  The dinning room is open 24-7 and the kitchen is stocked with non-perishable food items for those moments when food or drink is needed.

        The Renucci House was founded by Peter P. Renucci and his wife Patricia Renucci.  Back in 1968 one of their children was born through a premature situation and had to stay in the hospital’s neonatal unit.  This was the basis of their awareness of the need to be close to your loved one who is in crisis.   They helped to fund the Renucci House with a gift of $1.6 million because they wanted to thank the community for what had been done for their family.  This is a gift that keeps on giving with a pay it forward theme that I love.

       The atmosphere is one of love, support and healing.  You feel very comforted if you find yourself in need of the Renucci House.  It goes beyond the staff or the comfortable rooms.  There is a very wonderful program of volunteerism that happens here.  Organizations, churches, families and individuals are encouraged to give of their time, talents, and blessings.  You can volunteer to donate and prepare meals for the families who are staying there.   This is normally a great expense for families who must stay nearby their family members during a hospital stay; it may be an expense the family cannot afford.   Truly, this is a huge blessing and one that shows an important part of caretaking and nurturing of families in crisis. 

         Our family benefitted from several meals that had been prepared and served by some of these volunteers.  It was a service that was provided with joy by the volunteers; and that was a wonderful blessing.  The meals were wonderful from the main dish to the salads, drinks and desserts.  One evening, a church had their youth providing community service help to serve the families of the Renucci House.  It was a group of fifth graders and their mentors.  These people went out of their way to be of service to those who stayed there that evening.  They mingled and interacted with the families and showed great care.   I think it is great that young people are being taught the importance of giving back to a community through volunteering their time, skills and willingness to be of service.  Kudos to those involved.

         Volunteers are encouraged to come and bake in the kitchen homemade baked goods or some other treat.  Put together snacks or care bags for the families.  This also opens the door to have conversations with family members who may need someone to talk to.  Comfort and peace are evident throughout the Renucci House because of the volunteer programs.

        The Renucci House actually operates quite a bit through their volunteer programs…from donated non-perishable food items which stock the kitchen for family members to use when they need it; to volunteers to help pay for the family members stay who can not afford to pay, to help cover the cost of staying in the Renucci House.   This is a big deal if a hospital stay goes on for very long.  Family members may have a hard time paying for their rooms, or much needed items to be able to stay close to their loved ones.   Some volunteers give gift cards to be used at local stores or restaurants in the area.    Perhaps donating a telephone calling card would benefit families who are staying at the Renucci House but have long distance calls to make.   Talk to the manager of the house to see if current magazines can be donated or perhaps you have a nurturing spirit and have time to greet guests or maybe volunteer to help in the library.  Empty nesters  or retirees who find themselves with time on their hands may wish to do something meaningful with all of their spare time.   The Renucci House volunteers provide breakfast and dinners daily…they need a large number of volunteers who are willing to provide this needed service.

       You know, the Renucci House is near to the Lemmen -Holton Cancer Pavilion, the Devos Children’s Hospital, and the Lena Meijer Heart Center; all of these facilities have patients and families.   There is a huge need to support those patients and their families at a time when they are facing some of the biggest battles of their lives.   Often there are so many emotions to deal with such as fear, anxiety, depression, sadness and hope.  The Renucci House provides the basics to allow people to cope with their emotions.   Please, spread the word, volunteer and give help when and where you can.  Having compassion and opening your hearts to opportunities to help is an important part of life…please get involved.   You never know when you or someone you care about may need some of those same things.

        If someone has time or talent to give or just feels moved to donate monitarily to the Renucci House you can contact their house manager at (616) 391-1790.  

 You can view their website here: http://www.spectrum-health.org/renucci .  My family is going to volunteer soon…we may even take our youth group down and prepare a meal for the family members in the near future.  As a family who has benefitted from a stay at the Renucci House recently, I want to say thank you to all of the volunteers, to the staff of the Renucci House and to the Renucci Family themselves for impacting the Grand Rapids community and it’s surrounding area with love, compassion and support.  You are appreciated greatly!

        That should be a comfort in itself; so then why do we fight it?   Whenever we try to take control and steer our lives in the path that we think it should go…we are operating blindly; it is good to remind ourselves of that.  For we only see our small portion of the jigsaw puzzle or road map.  God, you DESIGNED the jigsaw puzzle and the map; you know where every single piece of the puzzle fits; you know which road to take to avoid additional hazzards. 

        God, you alone know how each piece of our lives are supposed to fit together to create something beautiful and whole.  While we sometimes struggle to MAKE the pieces fit, and  occasionally they may even appear to fit together for a time…in the end; we often discover our mistake in trying to force something to work that does not belong there at all. 

        We need you God to make sense of it all, to guide us in our decisions, our reactions, our ACCEPTANCE, of what is supposed to be.  We need you to guide us in the areas of our lives to avoid and reject…to put our feet on the path that they belong on; even if it is dark and scary.  For you are the light, by which we can be sure, to follow to the correct destination.   Is it the obedience that you are looking for from us?  Why is that so hard to remember to do?

       Why do we worry, wonder and fret?  It is the unknown that terrifies us.   Imagination is usually a friendly companion in our daily lives, but in times of stress it can become the enemy towards building and strengthening our faith.  We want to trust and be a pillar of strength and encouragement…but, there is still the uncertainty of how things will turn out.   Do we feel worthy of a miracle in our lives when we desperately need it?  Do we KNOW  without a doubt that you love us ENOUGH to take care of our difficulties?   

           In the end, it doesn’t matter how we got where we are, nor does it matter if we like where we find ourselves…what does matter is how we choose to proceed; how we conduct ourselves in the midst of the challenges we face.  In other words…

          It is in our BEST INTEREST then to give up control,  remove doubt and fear from the equasion, find courage,  and expect miracles…trusting that even through the challenges…good will come.  Knowing with certainty that lives will be changed, improved, and blessed.   Thank you then God, for always being there; for loving us, and for helping us even when we are being problem children!

Bullying is more complicated these days because of the way in which it is done; it is psychological, it is persistent, and it can include threats, violence, or even sexual threats.  Most people over the age of 40 remember the school bully…you know the one.  He/She was the person who everyone feared and gave a wide berth to just because he sought out and picked on those he/she knew for a fact that they could take on and win.  We all have had some relationship to that kind of person.   However, now it seems that there is a group mentality when bullying or persistent harassment starts up.

  Back when i was growing up you had one of two options…ignore that person and stay far away from them or “stand up to them” and work up your courage to go toe to toe.  Remember the childhood phrase that we were all taught…sticks and stones will break your bones but words will never hurt you?  That couldn’t be farther from the truth; we all know that words have the power to destroy a person’s self-worth and the value of that person in the eyes of others.

Everyday it seems that we hear about another child/teen/college student that has been bullied or cyber stalked and trash talked about.  Many of those cases either end in a suicide or a violent attack or even in some cases of extreme bullying…a retribution plan of attack on a school with a violent outburst.  Lives are ruined, hearts and minds are damaged; many individuals end up in prison because of bullying.

 A real danger is people who think that bullying is a normal part of growing up…it isn’t and it should not ever be allowed.  Making excuses and telling a victim of such behavior to just ignore it is equal to nullifying their experience with bullying…which in effect tells them that they are powerless to change their circumstance in a positive way.

There is a hopelessness about our young people.   Many of them, in a desperate need to feel something, are self mutilating, becoming promiscuous,  developing eating disorders, or diving into the world of drug/alcohol addictions in reaction to their feelings about themselves and their lack of proper treatment by others.   They have been conditioned to think that nothing is going to change for the better; so they feel angry, bitter, broken and depressed.

 Don’t fool yourself into thinking that it doesn’t affect you, your children, your grandchildren, or the children in your church or neighborhood.  It does; and things are getting desperate.  Kids feel threatened, they feel demeaned and they feel powerless…so, many of them will arm themselves and things escalate quickly.   This is good for no one.

Respect for themselves as well as others is important to fight bullying.  Finding mentors for our young people is helpful…getting involved in sports or extra curricular activities that give them an appropriate sense of pride in themselves and their involvement.  Community service that gives them a sense of personal value and connects them to others who recognize their strengths and talents.  Inspiring hope and promise for a future is what kids need.  Instead, we often find that our young people aren’t getting those important messages about themselves.

With all of the new technology, kids are able to be “connected” 24 hours a day to not only their friends; but also, to people who wish them harm.  This connection includes cell phones, cell phone pictures, texts, email, chat lines, websites and forums.   Kids live in the midst of a multi-media blitz in their lives in school and at home.  Pay attention to them closely; watch for any changes in behavior, attitude, relationships and moods.  It could be life and death-for them and anyone who is in their lives, personally and socially.

Don’t think, not my child, not my child’s friend or the kids in my youth group.  I’ve worked with kids most of my adult life; for well over 30 years and things have broken down.  Kids, even good ones have low self esteem, they are depressed, frightened and angry.   Many of them don’t feel loved (even when they are), they don’t feel valued, appreciated or listened to.  They feel trapped and alone or isolated…even when they are surrounded by friends and activities.  It is a recipe for disaster not to recognize the patterns or seeds of destruction.

In truth, it makes you want to build a fortress around them to protect them against those who seek them out to do them harm.  So what can a parent, an educator, a spiritual leader, a friend, or a sibling do to help those caught in the web of persistent bullying/stalking?

First of all, pay attention.  Listen closely, monitor things…set limits of exposure online.  Talk to them and their friends about situations of bullying in their school or social networks.  Document any kind of negative interaction…write it down, talk to the school administration, file a report, alert teachers, bus drivers, neighborhood watches to any kind of bullying or violent situations that may come up.  Create a network of awareness and prevention where you can.  Ask your school to bring in safety experts and relationship experts who are trained in these areas of concern. 

Expect there to be resistence from the powers that be.  Many of them will give lip service to the no tolerance rule of bullying…but never, EVER, let them talk you out of filing official reports or grievances.   Often a school will just expell a student for a short time as a discipline…never following up with corrective action such as counseling or conflict resolution.   Leadership must establish methods of dealing with this type of behavior in a constructive way. 

For the victims of bullying or school violence… it may be helpful to have some self-defense training, some skilled training about paying attention to their surroundings and who is in their direct physical environment; making judgement calls about making decisions about where to go and with whom.   Get restraining orders or personal orders of protection if you feel it is something necessary to the physical and emotional well-being of the victim.     In some cases, change schools or even in extreme cases…it is best to even move or send them to live with a relative temporarily-especially if there is gang involvement.   This is no small thing to overcome and you do not want a victim of bullying/violence to become a prisoner to fear in their everyday life.

Does that sound like an over-reaction?  I can assure you that it is not; don’t believe me?  Watch the news, listen to a mother or a father that has lost a child to school violence or bullying; they would do anything if they could go back and do something different.   Or maybe listen to the child who in reaction to the bullying, who took matters into his/her own hands and tried to retaliate only to end up in prison for years or for life.  That ought to convince you that taking drastic measures to protect your child or your family is a good thing.  You see, persistent bullying often spreads and becomes a contagious thing…affecting other family members or sometimes even others in the neighborhood.   It is serious, but things can be done to improve the situation; get good advice from law enforcement or safety experts on the matter.

Ok, remember that I mentioned that some of you wouldn’t make it this far because you think it doesn’t affect you.  These young people who are traumatized, or trained to protect themselves emotionally by closing off normal pathways of emotion, are going to grow up.  They are going to become doctors, lawyers, nurses, teachers and nursing home supervisors, counselors and so on.

If their standards of what is acceptable, in relation to inappropriate levels of behavior have been damaged, are you going to want them caring for your grandchildren in day care, or taking care of one of your loved ones in a hospital or nursing home setting?  If they have learned to accept that kind of treatment in their own life, they surely won’t recognize it as inappropriate behavior in relation to others like yourself.  

Please, love on the youth today build them up and help them to be strong individuals in a healthy way; care for them, listen to them, protect them through legal channels and through school policies.  You won’t regret being proactive in the name of what is right!

       Today, we send our kids to school and don’t know if they are going to be safe; shot, bullied, knifed, or sexually assaulted.  Children can no longer play outdoors without being supervised, even into the teen years because of kidnapping, sexual assaults, or driveby shootings.  Gang activity has become surrogate family for some youths who either can’t avoid getting pulled in or are forced into it by not having a way to get out of it.

         Shopping centers and banks are prone to violence.  Churches have to have guards because of threats of violence or unrest.  Pastors/Priests/Rabbi’s/or other Spiritual Advisors can’t meet with anyone alone for fear of being accused of wrongdoing or out of fear for their safety.  God forbid that they seek the quiet of the church to pray alone or work…because, someone could come in and do them bodily harm.  The sanctity of the church or God’s house is no longer given the respect it deserves as a place of refuge and spiritual nurturing. 

           Driving along the road you can be injured or killed because someone else may have a road rage problem.  Walking to your vehicle from any business can cause you to be kidnapped, mowed over by another vehicle, chased down and raped or beaten.  It is a randomness that can happen to anyone, no matter their training if they happen to be distracted long enough to be vulnerable.

             You can’t get through a year without hearing of someone shooting at vehicles on the highway or dropping items off of an overpass onto unsuspecting travelors.  Office place or work related violence is becoming the norm.  If someone is fired or is not getting along with their co-workers they hatch a plan to kill, maim and destroy.

            Daycares are under attack, children are being killed, tortured or brutalized by the very people who are supposed to love them and protect them…. or by their very own family members.   We have kids killing neighbors, friends…and enemies; young child or elderly, male/female, it does not seem to matter.  They do not care about the well-being of their fellow human beings.  

          Could it be that they have been “desensitized” towards the feelings or safety of others by years of abuse & neglect role modeled in their own families, or on their choice of entertainment-ie: movies, videos, video games, books and magazines?  Some of those entertainments use violence and sexual assault as part of their entertainment.   Do these offenders understand the line between make believe (acting) and real life?  Clearly, I don’t think they do; or if they do, they do not equate their actions with the consequences that are sure to follow!

               Now, as of yesterday…we have our own military personel firing on their own fellow soldiers with the intent to kill, maim and destroy.    Now the analyzers go into action mode trying to understand such an attack…and yes, that is important.  However, I don’t know about you…but, it gets very frustrating to me to hear of any kind of news item of this nature which then turns into a litany of “EXCUSES” for why the event took place.  Whether it was childhood trauma, abuse, or neglect, religious beliefs, terrorism, fear, anxiety, anger issues or control issues, or an inability to connect with others…underneath it all, it doesn’t change the outcome. 

 There has to be common sense used in how we handle these things; otherwise:

            Being raised to be careful will no longer good enough…we will have to raise our children, our teens and instruct our elders to no longer trust, to no longer give the benefit of the doubt about someone’s intentions.  We will have to teach them to be paranoid about being hurt, taken advantage of …of expecting someone to take out their rage from their childhood on the innocent people in their path on the wrong day.  It is a sick way of thinking…but, to survive the violent society that we have allowed the United States of America to become….we will have to always be looking for things to not be right around us.  Don’t just look over your shoulder, don’t just observe the stranger in your neighborhood…you’ll have to watch your neighbor…make sure he or she is “safe” to be around.   This is not a natural way to live our lives!

         Families, communities, schools, businesses, churches and the armed forces have characters from all walks of life.  People with good intentions, good will, and a willingness to treat others with respect, reponsibility, trust, safety and honor are becoming the minority.  Oh there are plenty of good people out there; but, they are starting to feel outnumbered.  We must build people up, encourage them and reward those who do the right things by recognizing them and their deed…simply for the idea that it IS the right thing to do!!!  

          If we don’t get a handle on how we are heading as a society we are going to be living in a war zone…everywhere we go; just like alot of places around the globe.    It is a sad observation of where we have been, where we are now, and where we are on our way to becoming as an American society, in the future, if we don’t attempt to make some p0sitive changes. 

          The reason for this violence?  No one seems to know at this early stage; although a family member said that he was fearful of being deployed to Iraq.   What is known is that soldiers expect danger and violence when they go to war, however they don’t expect on their own home base on American soil from one of their own.  

           The psychological terror and stress this incident has and will continue to instill in our soldiers is going to have a tremendous effect on our military men and women.   It is being said that the shooter was about to be deployed to Iraq.  He was supposedly trained in psychiatry and disaster relief regarding traumatic stress.  What then, could explain his actions (or those who joined him)?  Will we ever know the whole story?

             In the media there is speculation about his background and whether this was an act of terrorism.  I don’t know about his religious/ethnic background…and, I think people need to be very careful not to judge on that score until more information is known; however, it definitely is psychological terrorism. 

               This shooting took place in an area of the base called the Soldier Readiness Facility.  This building is a stop for final medical and or dental treatments before military personel are sent overseas for deployment.   This assault on the troops right before they are deployed is a terrible psychological trauma.  I wonder why a person, who had the kind of medical/psychological training that Mr. Hassan had, would do such a thing?  Did he have a mental breakdown …or did he plan a deliberate attack on his fellow soldiers mental preparations right before they were sent off to war for some other reason?

         This kind of situation damages trust and training that troops are instilled with.  They need to be able to trust and depend on one another.  How can they do that when they don’t know if one of their own is going to open fire or kill their own fellow soldiers?  They have enough to deal with when fighting a war with the enemy…without worrying about having an enemy within their own ranks.

          We have to be careful not to judge any group of people by an individual’s actions.  Everyone is responsible for their own actions; and prejudice is an ugly thing.   There are going to be those who will play the blame game on a particular race, religion or ethnic background; that is not ok.  To know the truth of this horrible violence, we will have to wait for more information to know what is behind this violence.  In the meantime we need to pray for those who were killed , injured or just traumatized; and, for their friends and families. 

        For children, pets provide companionship, responsibility, compassion and they encourage physical activity.  For adults…surprisingly they provide the same thing.  The bond that can develop between human and animal is an amazing thing.  Pets have been shown to reduce blood pressure, cholesterol, a sense of loneliness or emptyness…as well as lowering a person’s triglyceride level.  Pets need to be walked and groomed…this encourages exercise for both the pet and the owner.

         People who are struggling with chronic illness/disease such as cancer or diabeties; or are isolated from an active social life really tend to bond with their pets.   In some nursing homes, there is a resident cat or dog who can provide an emotional connection for the elderly, or terminally ill, who are not able to bring in their own pets to the facility.   These pet/human relationships are healthy and supplies them both with a mutual nurturing relationship providing comfort and care.

         In some cases, pets can serve a dual purpose in that they also function as a service provider for the disabled when properly trained.  There is a great organization called Paws With A Cause that is celebrating 30 years of  positive impact.  I applaud them and the work that they do.   You can learn more about them and the work that they do here:  http://www.pawswithacause.org/history.asp .  If you can provide them some support please do.  You wont be disappointed because the work that they do gives back to the community and the individuals in it.  Do you know of a special relationship between a person and their pet that you could share with the readers?

            However, for those that do spend….they are quickly overwhelmed when they discover the amount of new skills and knowledge that they must acquire before they can even begin to make lots money…not to mention the discouragement that sets in when they realize how long it will be before they learn enough to make that huge investment of money back.  It just isn’t practical to spend thousands and wait 12 months to 2 years to learn enough knowledge and skills to make your money back.  Marketing is a system for selling products or services; and, because it is a system…that means there are many components. 

          What if you could learn some of the techniques that would bring in enough money to pay an extra bill or two a month?  Would that be a benefit to you?  I am sure that it would.  Rapid Cash doesn’t promise to make you millions or guarantee that you will be driving a new car in a week…that is foolishness.  On the other hand, Rapid Cash can add enough cash to your pocket to help take some of the pressure off the average person’s monthly struggles http://tinyurl.com/djr2a7 . 

       You see, what alot of those big named gurus and their programs promise you is unrealistic when you think about it.  In their sales pages and videos…they are flaunting their cars, their mansions and piles of money.  Yes it is possible to acquire those things; however, what they often don’t tell you is that it has taken them years and tons of money to learn how to earn the kind of skills and knowledge needed to make that happen.  It does not happen overnight like that for the average person.  It takes alot of work…and a whole lot of expert help to get to that level. 

          People are often manipulated by those ads to believe that they can achieve that level of success quickly.  Realistically, learning is a process and everyone has to start somewhere.  I am an affiliate for Rapid Cash Marketing.  http://tinyurl.com/djr2a7   They teach you how to use skills and knowledge to earn extra money while you learn those other things about making money online, learning a proven, in- depth internet marketing system that can lead to a higher level of internet marketing success. 

       There is a team of coaches who are there to teach you how to pick up extra cash to supplement your income with skills that you may already have or can quickly develop.   They are knowledgable in many areas and use these skills themselves to earn money online.    Do you have digital photo experience, interviewing skills, graphic arts skills, writing skills, direct marketing skills, writing sales letters, video skills,  voice over abilities, editing skills, etc?  The list goes on…but, if you could learn how to use those skills in an effective way to earn enough money to take the edge off of your present financial situation it would be a blessing right?  

          If you are willing to learn and willing to take action towards achieving some financial success online then check out this link:  http://tinyurl.com/djr2a7   Yes, I will get a financial reward if you were to purchase…but, if their program improved your finances; then, I think you would thank me anyway!   I think you will see the wisdom in investing a small amount of money that will quickly repay your investment if you put in the effort to do what the successful internet marketers Jeff Wellman, Dixie Brown, and Paul Counts instruct you to do. 

I think when people are being honest with themselves…through word, thought or action…they know when they are operating with integrity, either in their personal or business relationships.  There is no regret, no shame or guilt, no need to stretch the truth or exaggerate a situation, no need for lies…no need to over-hype how something is presented when someone is operating with a responsible personal integrity.    People who choose to operate without integrity know it in their hearts.  They don’t feel good about their thoughts, their words, or their actions when they make choices that violate their own standards of integrity.  It may manifest itself in feelings of shame or regret, or with a general sense of feeling unworthy of accolades/rewards or, even financial success; it is possible that they will have unexplained health problems.

Inner conflict happens when we are at odds with our understanding of what is right and what is wrong.  Most of us have a keen sense of what is right and what is wrong in how others treat us, correct?  I know I do.  Even young children have a strong sense of justice/injustice; they are quick to point out when something is not fair or right.

So, my question is…do we present integrity in our relationships in the same way that we expect others to show us integrity of high value?

I have been reading a book discussing people and their internal conflict about what they should do with their time on earth; as far as, a job or a purpose in life.  One particular story troubled me.  It was about a man who lived in a financially depressed area of the world.  He had difficulty finding and maintaining a job.  He took a job with a casino.  At first, he was just a little uncomfortable with the idea of it…gambling.  As he worked and collected his pay check…he became desensitized to the environment that encouraged people to bet/gamble money that they didn’t really have to waste.  He comforted himself with the idea that there were no other jobs where he lived so he continued working there.

As time went on, he faced his inner conflict about the integrity of working for a place that disregarded the fact that gambling went against what he believed to be ok; until he heard his co-workers making fun of an elderly man who was weeping at one of the gaming tables, having lost thousands of dollars that he did not have to lose.  He was disqusted with them and told them to stop making fun of this man and his tears of desperation.  They then chose to make fun of him.  Rather than stand up for what he believed, he ran away…doing nothing, changing nothing.  He went to a spiritual counselor, (a poor one in my opinion), who told him not to make any rash decisons, basically, to just hang in there until something different came along.  Now this man was telling his spiritual advisor that he didn’t feel like he deserved God’s love or anyone else’s love either; he was wounding himself by not acting on his personal sense of integrity.  Was the spiritual advisor acting with personal/spiritual integrity?  I don’t think so personally.

Some time passed and the man became ill and went to his doctor…the doctor correctly told him he was depressed and prescribed a pill.  Instead of sending the man to a counselor/therapist…he gave him a pill.  Was the doctor acting with integrity…maybe/maybe not.  Maybe we don’t have all of the facts here…maybe he prescribed him the pill and requested he seek counseling; I dont know.  If not…should he have done so to fulfill his personal/professional integrity?  In my opinion, yes, he should have sought the source of the man’s depression…not just treat the symptoms with a pill.

What would options look like, to someone in this working man’s position?  Stay in the job and hate what you do…and possibly yourself, for what you are doing to earn a living when it goes against your personal beliefs?  Quit the job and hope another one comes along?  Stay in the job; but, actively look for new employment?  Leave the area and find a job in another environment that is more in line with his sense of personal integrity; one that honors what he believes to be true and right? Commute back and forth for an hour or more a day to an area where jobs were more plentiful? Maybe work online to provide financial income for himself?  What would be the choice that would fulfill his need for income as well as allow him to honor his beliefs about what is right and wrong?

It could very well be the choice that causes him to sacrifice his personal comfort zone…leading him to leave his home area and move to an area where his choices for jobs were not limited to something that violated his sense of  right and wrong.  Or, put extra burdeon on his time by requiring him to commute, back and forth, each day to get employment that he could live happily with.   He could have chosen to work at home on the computer…or gone to school to increase his ability to get hired by learning new skills.  Only this man knows what would have worked best for him and his physical and spiritual well-being.

What did this man do?  He stayed working where he felt it was wrong to work and took his pill to make it acceptable to himself.  Was that employing the best level of integrity that he possessed?  Or did it just allow him to numb himself to the inner voice that was encouraging him to make changes that would allow him to take pride in what he did for a living?

There is nothing sadder than a person who knows to do right and chooses to do wrong because you know that it is not only harming himself/herself; but, possibly others as well.  Every choice we make or avoid affects other people.  Scripture gives us all kinds of instruction on this area of life.  Isaiah 1:17 says, Stop doing wrong, learn to do right, seek justice, encourage the oppressed, defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow.   Exodus 23: 2 says, Do not follow the crowd in doing wrong.  When you give testimony in a lawsuit, do not pervert justice by siding with the crowd.  Making decisions in our lives is important because those decisions affect how we see ourselves and our place in the world; if we want to live with peace in our hearts and minds we must make those decisions that uphold who we are based on our own personal integrity; no matter how difficult those decisions may seem at the time.

Most people really do not know how to start preparing.  That is what National Preparedness Month is all about.  I want to share a couple of websites with you so that you can benefit from the information they provide to help you get ready to face whatever kind of emergency situation you are faced with.

Before I do that, I would like to say that there are some very simple things you can do to prepare for any difficulty you may face.  The other sites will help you to prepare for other specific disasters or emergencies.  First off, putting together a simple emergency kit is important.

Start with a good sized tote and fill it with a couple of days supplies of non-perishable food stuff-this may include things like formula  (if a baby is in the house) or soft foods for the elderly, at least a 3-5 day supply of water for each person in the family, high energy protein bars, small containers of medication in waterproof containers for chronic conditions, toilette paper, waterproof matches, flashlights & batteries, cell phone & charger, important documents & ID, blankets, and change of clothing, a can opener,a small radio, walkie-talkies or hand held CB, hand sanitizer gel, small cook stove or portable small grill with fuel, camping lantern, small portable folded rain poncho, small foil folded emergency blanket to retain warmth, hand or foot chemical foot warmer packets, first aid kit, these are all basics.  You think about what you or a specific family member needs to survive several days without help.  Make your kit tailor made for your family’s survival in mind.  Dont forget the family pets…keep emergency pet food and water supply for them as well.   This site may help you to discover what to put in your kit: http://www.ready.gov/america/npm09/getakit.html

Think about where you live and what kind of natural disasters happen often in your area…if you are prone to flooding…then definately prepare for that…not only in your home…but in your vehicle as well.  Have something handy in your vehicle that will allow you to cut the seat belts & break the vehicle windows if you are trapped in flooded waters.  Many people die each year because they can’t get their windows open due to water pressure on the windows.  If your area is prone to tornadoes…learn about the safest place in your home to wait out the storm.  The same thing with wildfires…do you have an emergency evacuation plan worked out?  You get the idea, keeping safety and well-being in mind, take action.

Another thing I learned about recently is a battery company that is doing it’s part to help prepare cities that are vulnerable to weather related emergencies.  They are donating what they call hours of power by donating batteries to first reponders and law enforcement authorities in those cities by having visitors to their blog simply click on a button.  There is no cost, you dont have to sign up for anything…you simply click on their button.  This is something everyone with a computer can do.  Check it out here and click:  http://www.duracell.com/us/hoursofpower/cities.asp or here: http://www.duracell.com/us/hoursofpower/safety-tips.asp .

Ok, now that you know what to do…get ready, get set…go prepare!

        Women need to be aware of the danger of taking any over the counter medication during pregnancy; without the advice of their doctor.  Often there are label warnings on packages…but sometimes, they are writting in small print.   They must avoid high stress (pregnant or not…that is good advice).  Pregnancy can put stress on relationships as well.  If the woman is involved in a relationship that is unstable or prone to emotional or physical abuse…she needs to be aware of her vulnerability in that situation. 

       Consulting with those in her community who are trained professionals is important in those situations for their safety and well-being.   Seeking the advice of those who work with abused women is also good.  You can do this on a local level, or you can do it online here: http://www.ndvh.org/ but beware, a woman who is being intimidated or abused at home may have her computer monitored.  If it is discovered that she is reaching out to others…she could be at risk for more violence…so use a computer that is safe to use. 

          It is unfortunate that we live in a world where violence directed towards women happens every day.  We hear, on the news, scary reports of women being killed, by strangers, for their unborn children.  Not only do women have to be aware that such dangers exist;  they must also take precautions when they go out in their communities during their daily routines.  It is sad but true…there are people who live and breathe, who care only about their own wants and desires…some of them are mentally unstable and dangerous.  A pregnant woman has to be very aware of her surroundings at all times.

          If that isn’t enough, women often worry about things like miscarriage, or birth defects.  It is normal to have those thoughts and concerns…but, outside of avoiding drugs/alcohol/smoking and taking care to eat a healthy, well balanced diet rich in folic acid and maintaining a healthy weight; there isn’t much that a woman can do to control things like a miscarriage or birth defect risks.  Well, that is not exactly true…in my opinion, because I believe in the power of prayer in all situations.  God is good and is the giver of life.

        Everyday there is some kind of new discovery about what is, and what is not, safe for a pregnant woman.  Alot of it is common sense when it comes to making choices and decisions. 

         When it comes to exercising during pregnancy…most of the time, medical professionals will tell a woman that whatever she was doing before becoming pregnant is probably safe.  However each woman, with every pregnancy, must see her doctor and decide what is right for her and her baby, at that moment in time; because, situations can change from day to day.  Getting regular checkups while pregnant is always the best advice.  Your doctor or nurse can answer any questions about what you should or should not be doing.

         Which brings me to my next topic, which is a news article on the upcoming flu season; and, women getting flu shots.  It is being recommended by many doctors, according to a news report that I read on the ABC news website, that women who are pregnant, or expecting to be pregnant, get the flu shot when it is released; to help protect them from the swine flu.  The media keeps talking about a possible pandemic regarding the flu.  They say that pregnant women are more vulnerable to the swine flu because their immune systems are lower during pregnancy and it could complicate their health, as well as the health of the baby that they carry. 

           While some advocate getting the flu vaccination…others would caution a woman to be very careful in making that decision.  Again, the best source of information is going to be your health care provider. 

          Now, I know that a woman can’t help but worry about all the things that could go wrong with a pregnancy; but, it seems to me that if you spend all of your time worrying…you won’t have any time to enjoy the pregnancy.  This is the time that she, as a mother, spends bonding with her child as it grows in her womb.   Are there worries; sure there are.  However, those worries do not have to dominate the pregnancy.  Taking some simple precautions during the time that others in her circle of influence are ill, should help to keep a pregnant woman healthy.

           Keeping her opportunities of exposure down to a bare minimum is important; cutting down on some social activities during peak flu season is advisable.  Washing her hands often and well is one of the best ways to avoid becoming sick.  Keeping hand sanitizer in her purse , office, or her vehicle and using it often is a good thing.  Using antibacterial sprays on surfaces that are used in community type environments is good; such as in bathrooms and kitchens.    Avoid large gatherings where exposure to sickness of any kind is greatly increased due to the numbers of people.  

           Of course, the best things that you can do for your baby; you should also, already, be doing for yourself.  Those things are to be involved in a loving & healthy relationship with the co-parent of your child.  Eat balanced meals and get plenty of rest.  Make sure that meats  and eggs are cooked long enough to kill any contaminants.  Wash fresh fruits and vegetables well to get rid of pesticides.   Drink lots of water and milk (preferrably milk that is pasteurized, and without any additives).  Avoid alcohol, smoking, stress and dangerous activities.  If your doctor advises it; take prenatal vitamins.  Exercise under the advice of your physician.   Pregnancy doesn’t last forever and this time is precious.  Worrying about everything under the sun doesn’t change a thing; but, taking steps to ensure a healthy and happy pregnancy does.