Sandra Bullock is in the news again…under her own terms this time. She is announcing through People magazine and her cover story that not only is she divorcing her husband Jesse James; but, she is the mother of a newly adopted baby son, born in New Orleans. After months of headlining the news due to no fault of her own, she is in the driver’s seat with these announcements.
For once in recent months, she is not at the mercy of someone else out to make news headlines from standing on top of her tragic connection to the negative headlines concerning her husband’s alleged infidelities. I am sure this is not how she originally planned to announce her son’s birth; however, it is good to have a bright light in this situation…Sandra’s celebration of her new life with her son.
Sandra who is known for her clean and loving image and reputation has been dealt a raw deal by those alleged mistresses and their stories that they’ve shared in the media. Their public claims of “sorry for the mess” carries little weight, I am sure. Their requests for one- on- one time with her to discuss their “relationships” with Sandra’s husband…should not be given the time of day. Sandra owes them no such gesture.
All along, Sandra has kept her peace and her dignity. Not easy to do with some of the muck that was published. However, Sandra is now voicing the fact that she is divorcing her husband, and also sharing the joy of her leap into single motherhood. She has the finances and the support systems to be able to parent quite well as a single mother. She will not face many of the challenges that many other single mothers face and that is a blessing. The dissolution of her marriage is a tragedy…leave her alone to heal on that. Allow her to celebrate and enjoy the things that bring happiness to her and her loved ones; for once, don’t pick at what should be a private family event.
The People article speaks of the fact that Sandra and Jesse were adopting her son Louis together in January. Then came the Oscars…they were waiting until that event was over to announce the adoption of their son. We all know that a week after the Oscars the headlines gleefully announced the assault on Sandra’s marriage. Women came out of the wood-work to share the gory details of their encounters with Jesse James. Sandra moved out of the home she shared with her husband and his children from former relationships. The tabloids took joy in following up one lurid headline after another…and it is unfortunate that there is a huge market for selling such newspapers on the backs of other people’s pain and misery. It doesn’t speak well of our culture to have such an environment for our children to grow up in, in my opinion.
She kept quiet in the media, except to declare the fact that an alleged sex tape did not exist. That had to be painful enough to have to address something related to the horror of those stories; still, now it is easy to understand why she made the statement. It was to distance herself from being tainted with the poor choices of those who brought down her marriage. She was not reponsibile for making such personally devastating choices with her own behavior; even though allegedly her husband and those who had physical relationships with him are. Sandra should not be held accountable for their actions nor should she suffer the loss of her son because of them. By stating that there was no sex tape with her in it…she was standing tall and distancing herself from the immoral activity that was affecting her because of her association with it just by being married to Jesse.
I can imagine the fear and despair she felt as a new adoptive parent. She had to have been fearful that the agencies that approved her adoption process would rightfully question whether that adoption should be finalized. It is every adoptive parents concern that “something” will happen to derail an adoption and tear apart a parent-child relationship that has formed.
The headlines screamed all kinds of concern about the stability of Sandra and Jesse’s relationship at this point. It would only be right of those concerned about the welfare of a child to want to know how that would impact Sandra’s son. Remember, courts have to insure the best interests of the child; that is a big responsibility. But, for most adoptive parents, any concerns an agency or court would have would normally be addressed privately…not in the media. No adoptive parent wants something to come into play that would jepardize their blossoming relationship with their child or perhaps end their quest to come together as parent and child.
For those who have no relationship with adoption, you should know that adoptive parents often live with others putting their parenting under the microscope. People in general feel that it is ok to voice their input about an adoptive parent should or should not do in regards to parenting their child. In Sandra’s case, she was a victim of circumstance and timing. Jesse made those choices and Jesse has to address those issues within himself.
Jesse went off to rehab…and allegedly left rehab…only to return. In the meantime, I am sure the behind the scenes details continued to be worked out in regards to the adoption. Strength and courage in the face of challenges comes from a person’s internal character. It doesn’t make the devastation any less with the dissolution of a marriage…however, I am sure that Sandra’s relationship with her friends and family will help her to heal.
I would caution readers to remember that there are many “innocent” people in these situations from in-laws to friends and neighbors. They all suffer when these things happen; that is both the beauty and the pain of having deep personal relationships with others. With the announcement that Sandra is now adopting her son as a single parent and stating that the adoption is no longer including Jesse, the concerns about stability and appropriateness should now be eliminated. Louis will be loved, protected, and cared for and that is the goal of adoption. It is all life changing news that Sandra “chose” to share with People magazine.
Congratulations Sandra Bullock on the adoption of your son. May you have a long, healthy & happy life together as mother and son. No matter what happens with your marriage, I hope that you are able to continue having a loving and supportive relationship with Jesse’s children. They will need that and so will you.
Life gets so complicated sometimes and the innocent are often caught up in the ripples of negativity from the actions of others. Sandra has been a constant in Jesse’s children’s life for quite a few years now…hopefully that can continue. I am sure that the older children have begun to bond with Louis as well…may peace and love be yours once again. Oh and by the way, let me be the first to say, Happy Mother’s Day in a couple weeks!
.gif)
Oh, I’m so happy to see you address this, Rainy!
Raising Louis is going to be a wonderful way for Sandra to heal from the pain of their divorce…PLUS, who knows what possibilities to serve might open up for her and this little boy in the future.
Under “ordinary” circumstances, this could be a recipe for disaster but I see only good things and joy coming from this situation because it is borne of love, devotion, and caring.
WHAT CHILD DOES NOT NEED THOSE FOR A HEALTHY, HAPPY LIFE?
Thanks Connie, I absolutely agree with you. Every child needs and deserves love, devotion, and caring. I expect we will see an extra ordinary bond between Sandra and Louis.
You know, I saw that Jesse says that he has a hole in his heart now because he loves Louis and he knows that because of his actions and the pain he caused Sandra; he is going to miss out on helping to raise him. He made a plea that people not judge Sandra because of his actions. He is starting to understand and take responsibility for it all.
I believe sometimes human beings make decisions and take actions that are harmful to themselves and others while having absolutely no clue how destructive those choices will be; even though they know without a shadow of a doubt that those choices/actions are wrong.
It is quite often a lack of accountability to a higher power that allows such human arrogance to believe that it is our life and we alone should be in charge of what we do, say, and feel. And saying that, who among us has not been there and done that, as far as living as though our thoughts, actions and feelings will impact no-one else? Still there are consequences when we are destructive to ourselves or others. It is sad, but part of the life lessons we are meant to learn while living and breathing! Thanks for commenting.