First off, I want to say that I did not join in or comment on her Twitter stream because I don’t think that she is looking so much for conversation about her choice to abort a pregnancy, as she is looking for agreement with her right to do so, as well as some notoriety.  She says that she was looking for support from her friends during the abortion. 

        See, the back story is that this woman has a 4 year old special needs son.  She lives with the child and her boyfriend (the father of this child she is trying to abort).  I wonder what he thinks…if he is as much in support of the public abortion as she is?  In her twitter stream she called this child she was carrying a “thing”, a thing that didn’t have sex organs yet; in relationship to another twitter persons tweet for life. 

         I am trying to imagine what a man would think about his child being called a thing?  What about grandparents, aunts/uncles, cousins or the woman’s young son when he grows up…how do, or will, any of them feel about this abortion?  Should their opinions count?    How does abortion impact those who are in relationships with people who choose abortion as their path?  Does it create issues between them if they are in disagreement with the choice to have an abortion?

        According to the news articles that I have read, this adult woman had a first pregnancy which was allegedly life threatening to her.  She was “advised” not to get pregnant again because of that first pregnancy and the high risk that she endured.  So, from what I understand from the various articles on the subject…she decided that if she were to get pregnant again she would have an abortion to end it.  Obviously, whatever form of birth control they were using was not effective because she became pregnant.

       When she discovered that she was pregnant she allegedly tweeted that she was pregnant.  She found out early that she was indeed pregnant so that allowed her to use the chemical form of abortion called RU486.  Since she went this route…she has been tweeting the process.  Telling of the cramping, the bleeding, and all of the other gory details.  This process can take days.   This process of abortion can be  dangerous…but, she seems to believe that it is worth the risk. 

         I do not believe in abortion…and it seems to me that it is a gamble with her life either way…either from carrying the pregnancy as far as is humanly possible or, from having the abortion.   I would not wish a high risk pregnancy on anyone; however, I personally would have more respect for her had she tried to carry this baby to term.  Even if she did not want to raise the child…she could attempt to give it life and place the child for adoption.

        Some people have been very supportive of what she is doing…others are not.  After all, abortion is a very polarizing subject.  People react according to their personal beliefs, experiences,  and values.  This woman also says that she is an athiest.   From my visit to her Twitter stream I found her to be not only vocal about the abortion but also about religion and other subjects, such as foster care.  She like anyone in America has a right to voice her opinion.  Yet, she uses language that many would deem vulgar or filled with obsenities; hardly language that one would use to try to educate or pursuade another person towards their way of thinking on a particular subject.    She allegedly says that she is astonished at the level of reaction and attention that her attempt to “educate” people about abortion has attracted.

        I find that hard to believe.  I don’t think that you choose to go against traditional beliefs, values, and lifestyle without expecting others to have a strong reaction to it.  I happen to believe that for whatever reason, the very fact that many other people find her actions (regarding the abortion) and beliefs (religion) so wrong and offensive, gives her a sense of, her against the world… and I think in her mind, it empowers her.   Especially when those who oppose her strongly, wrongly attack her personally in their objection to what she has chosen to do.  Unfortunately, it seems that some people have even threatened her life…not only is that wrong…it is illegal.  The authorities will be involved in those situations appropriately, I am sure. 

       Understand, she is going to do what she wants to do; what we in this country have legally allowed her and any other woman that chooses to; and, that is to be able to legally abort the life of her child.  However, I myself do not wish to be watching her do what I myself find personally wrong.  I do believe in God and I believe in spiritual consequences.  She says that she doesn’t believe in God.  That is probably true…because I dont think it is easy to do what she is doing and have a close relationship with God…who i believe is the author of life. 

         A great number of women who have abortions suffer in later years because of their decision to abort.  They have emotional, physical and spiritual damage to their beings.  Some do not and continue to go on and have repeat abortions according to what their conscience dictates.  Legally this is allowed in the United States; it is unfortunate in my opinion.

        She doesn’t appear to care about my opinion or anyone elses probably.  By giving her more attention, it feeds the flames.  However, in my opinion the taking of the life of her child and throwing it away is wrong.  Once the child was conceived…it should have the right to be born.   What if she gets pregnant again in the future?  Why not pursue a permanent solution to her pregnancy potential?

          What about her life…the one that potentially could be threatened should she try to carry the baby (she calls it cells)?  Calling the baby a clump of cells is an attempt to deny the value of the life she carried.  Well, in my opinion…once she was told that it would be life threatening, in the future, for her to become pregnant; then, if she felt that she needed to protect her life…she either should have avoided sex (not practical) or she should have sought some permanent means of birth control such as having her tubes tied, or having a partial hysterectomy… or by choosing a sexual partner who had also taken drastic means of curbing the possibility of creating a pregnancy.   A combination of those choices would have ensured that she would not have become pregnant. 

         This whole subject opens to the door to a discussion about social media and what is acceptable, what will be allowed…what will people endorse or reject.  What are the socially acceptable standards or limitations?  Will we see someone comitting crimes and tweeting about it?  Or posting it on Facebook, or Myspace?  It is the testing of those limits that creates this drive to be the person that pushes the envelope.  It creates a media sensation or a backwards sort of fame.   It is horribly sad to me that in this case it was at the expense of the life of an unborn child.  What are your thoughts?

Bullying is more complicated these days because of the way in which it is done; it is psychological, it is persistent, and it can include threats, violence, or even sexual threats.  Most people over the age of 40 remember the school bully…you know the one.  He/She was the person who everyone feared and gave a wide berth to just because he sought out and picked on those he/she knew for a fact that they could take on and win.  We all have had some relationship to that kind of person.   However, now it seems that there is a group mentality when bullying or persistent harassment starts up.

  Back when i was growing up you had one of two options…ignore that person and stay far away from them or “stand up to them” and work up your courage to go toe to toe.  Remember the childhood phrase that we were all taught…sticks and stones will break your bones but words will never hurt you?  That couldn’t be farther from the truth; we all know that words have the power to destroy a person’s self-worth and the value of that person in the eyes of others.

Everyday it seems that we hear about another child/teen/college student that has been bullied or cyber stalked and trash talked about.  Many of those cases either end in a suicide or a violent attack or even in some cases of extreme bullying…a retribution plan of attack on a school with a violent outburst.  Lives are ruined, hearts and minds are damaged; many individuals end up in prison because of bullying.

 A real danger is people who think that bullying is a normal part of growing up…it isn’t and it should not ever be allowed.  Making excuses and telling a victim of such behavior to just ignore it is equal to nullifying their experience with bullying…which in effect tells them that they are powerless to change their circumstance in a positive way.

There is a hopelessness about our young people.   Many of them, in a desperate need to feel something, are self mutilating, becoming promiscuous,  developing eating disorders, or diving into the world of drug/alcohol addictions in reaction to their feelings about themselves and their lack of proper treatment by others.   They have been conditioned to think that nothing is going to change for the better; so they feel angry, bitter, broken and depressed.

 Don’t fool yourself into thinking that it doesn’t affect you, your children, your grandchildren, or the children in your church or neighborhood.  It does; and things are getting desperate.  Kids feel threatened, they feel demeaned and they feel powerless…so, many of them will arm themselves and things escalate quickly.   This is good for no one.

Respect for themselves as well as others is important to fight bullying.  Finding mentors for our young people is helpful…getting involved in sports or extra curricular activities that give them an appropriate sense of pride in themselves and their involvement.  Community service that gives them a sense of personal value and connects them to others who recognize their strengths and talents.  Inspiring hope and promise for a future is what kids need.  Instead, we often find that our young people aren’t getting those important messages about themselves.

With all of the new technology, kids are able to be “connected” 24 hours a day to not only their friends; but also, to people who wish them harm.  This connection includes cell phones, cell phone pictures, texts, email, chat lines, websites and forums.   Kids live in the midst of a multi-media blitz in their lives in school and at home.  Pay attention to them closely; watch for any changes in behavior, attitude, relationships and moods.  It could be life and death-for them and anyone who is in their lives, personally and socially.

Don’t think, not my child, not my child’s friend or the kids in my youth group.  I’ve worked with kids most of my adult life; for well over 30 years and things have broken down.  Kids, even good ones have low self esteem, they are depressed, frightened and angry.   Many of them don’t feel loved (even when they are), they don’t feel valued, appreciated or listened to.  They feel trapped and alone or isolated…even when they are surrounded by friends and activities.  It is a recipe for disaster not to recognize the patterns or seeds of destruction.

In truth, it makes you want to build a fortress around them to protect them against those who seek them out to do them harm.  So what can a parent, an educator, a spiritual leader, a friend, or a sibling do to help those caught in the web of persistent bullying/stalking?

First of all, pay attention.  Listen closely, monitor things…set limits of exposure online.  Talk to them and their friends about situations of bullying in their school or social networks.  Document any kind of negative interaction…write it down, talk to the school administration, file a report, alert teachers, bus drivers, neighborhood watches to any kind of bullying or violent situations that may come up.  Create a network of awareness and prevention where you can.  Ask your school to bring in safety experts and relationship experts who are trained in these areas of concern. 

Expect there to be resistence from the powers that be.  Many of them will give lip service to the no tolerance rule of bullying…but never, EVER, let them talk you out of filing official reports or grievances.   Often a school will just expell a student for a short time as a discipline…never following up with corrective action such as counseling or conflict resolution.   Leadership must establish methods of dealing with this type of behavior in a constructive way. 

For the victims of bullying or school violence… it may be helpful to have some self-defense training, some skilled training about paying attention to their surroundings and who is in their direct physical environment; making judgement calls about making decisions about where to go and with whom.   Get restraining orders or personal orders of protection if you feel it is something necessary to the physical and emotional well-being of the victim.     In some cases, change schools or even in extreme cases…it is best to even move or send them to live with a relative temporarily-especially if there is gang involvement.   This is no small thing to overcome and you do not want a victim of bullying/violence to become a prisoner to fear in their everyday life.

Does that sound like an over-reaction?  I can assure you that it is not; don’t believe me?  Watch the news, listen to a mother or a father that has lost a child to school violence or bullying; they would do anything if they could go back and do something different.   Or maybe listen to the child who in reaction to the bullying, who took matters into his/her own hands and tried to retaliate only to end up in prison for years or for life.  That ought to convince you that taking drastic measures to protect your child or your family is a good thing.  You see, persistent bullying often spreads and becomes a contagious thing…affecting other family members or sometimes even others in the neighborhood.   It is serious, but things can be done to improve the situation; get good advice from law enforcement or safety experts on the matter.

Ok, remember that I mentioned that some of you wouldn’t make it this far because you think it doesn’t affect you.  These young people who are traumatized, or trained to protect themselves emotionally by closing off normal pathways of emotion, are going to grow up.  They are going to become doctors, lawyers, nurses, teachers and nursing home supervisors, counselors and so on.

If their standards of what is acceptable, in relation to inappropriate levels of behavior have been damaged, are you going to want them caring for your grandchildren in day care, or taking care of one of your loved ones in a hospital or nursing home setting?  If they have learned to accept that kind of treatment in their own life, they surely won’t recognize it as inappropriate behavior in relation to others like yourself.  

Please, love on the youth today build them up and help them to be strong individuals in a healthy way; care for them, listen to them, protect them through legal channels and through school policies.  You won’t regret being proactive in the name of what is right!

        Patricia has played the character of Carlotta Vega on that show for over a decade.  I remember early on her appearances on that show, that she played a housekeeper, of sorts, for one of the main characters, Dorian Lord.  She played a strong role in voicing what should have been Dorian’s conscious when that character got herself into questionable situations by manipulating others.  Eventually, Patricia’s character Carlotta bought a restaurant and continued the role of adviser to many of the shows characters as they experienced problems in their “lives”.  Always her religious wisdoms and values showed through.

        I have quit watching soap operas and many other shows because of my personal beliefs.  I get tired of being “forced”, simply because there doesn’t appear to be many other choices, to watch entertainment shows that continue to erode and chip away at traditional family values or Christian values.   Our family recently gave up television because of many of these issues when the digital conversion took place.

          The problem that Patricia is now voicing is that she was allegedly  given a script or a direction in which she, as her character, was expected to be supportive of a gay storyline  which Patricia says is not authentic to who Patricia is as a Christian; nor would the Christian character Carlotta  realistically support a situation like that.   Patricia has said it is not the gay storyline that she objects to; but rather, the way that her character’s storyline was written.   Christian’s, for the most part, do not condone same sex relationships, as it goes against scripture in the Bible.  The Bible calls homosexuality, or the physical expression of romantic love between two people of the same sex, an abomination. 

           Is it right, fair, or legal for an employer to demand an employee to go against their personal religious beliefs in a job environment?   And, if it IS legal, who should a person obey…their employer or God?

         After hearing that Patricia is alleging that she has been let go of her character and replaced with another actress I started wondering about making a stand in a person’s workplace, when expected in the workplace to violate one’s personal beliefs.  I don’t know about the legality of such issues…but, I do know that it would be especially difficult or impossible to make myself  do or perform any work related job when I felt that it went against my beliefs as a Christian.   In my heart, and here on the blog, I support Patricia and her efforts to put her convictions out there as a testimony to her faith. 

          I wonder, have any of my readers had an experience at work  where they felt conflicted about something the boss expected them to do in their work environment, based on their religious beliefs?  How did you handle that situation? 

         Michigan needs jobs to be sure…but, many Michigan residents do not want to be that close to the turmoil that is going to be generated by the trials for these detainees.   These trials could have the potential of becoming an epi-center of protest, violence and or, additional acts of terrorism.  Michigan is not that desperate for jobs.  It is true that Michigan has closed down some prisons in the state and there are many corrections officers in need of jobs…but, this situation is extra-ordinary.   We know so little of what these inmates are being held for…their specific alleged acts of terrorism.  The government doesn’t release that kind of information. 

       Is it fair to have corrections officers in charge of those who are alleged to have been a part of extreme violence if they are not trained to work with such prisoners?  Shouldn’t that be a military responsibility?  Because of national security, we know very little in the civilian world about the risks of housing these inmates.   I just wonder if there is a prison that is secure enough and in an area of isolation that would provide enough safety for those in the surrounding areas near the prison.   There are more questions than answers regarding this situation that is allegedly supposed to be resolved near the end of this year… and that doesn’t leave much time to figure it out and take appropriate action.

          In my mind, this issue is going to be like the issue of barges that were refused to be allowed to dock, years ago, because there was no state or country willing to take the cargo on the barges….loads of trash.  Everyone knew that it needed to be dealt with but, noone wanted it in their own backyard.  No one wanted the responsibility of figuring out what to do with it. 

           These human prisoners from Guantanamo Bay need to have their legal situations resolved.   Human beings are more important than barges of trash…they can not wait forever to either go to trial for terrorism (if they have evidence against them) or, they need to be released back to the country from which they came.   Many of the detainees have alleged abuse or neglect while in custody.  Some have voiced complaints about religious violations, in the way that they were treated during their imprisonment.   How will all of these issues be resolved when so little information is released to the public?  If more information is released to the public, will it fan the flames of hatred and distrust?  Things are not simple or clear on how things will proceed.

          They are going to be moved soon as President Obama is planning on closing down the prison at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba…and, no one is going to want the responsibility of housing them for fear of repercussions by extremists.   Who would be in control of the proceedings; the government, the military, or the judicial system?  Where should they be moved to; and, how do you protect the safety of  those people living and working around whatever prison you move them to while they wait to go to trial?  What do you think should happen?

         For those who are addicted to Twitter either for communication, for social media purposes or for business connections these outages are frustrating.  The online traffic is mindboggling and temporary outages due to high traffic times are expected…but when the site is actually under attack…that is different.  People get nervous about their private information being taken.  Those who monitor such things have to really step up their defenses…and, there should be high consequences legally for those who are found to be behind such criminal behavior.

          The young man’s name is Joshua Fry and he has been diagnosed as Autistic.  He was living in a group home at the time of his enlistment; in fact, it is alleged that a Marine recruiter picked him up from the home and took him to the recruitment center to enlist.  The background of the story, as I understand it, is that this young man was born to parents who allegedly abused drugs.  He was diagnosed as being Autistic, as a young child.   Joshua was allegedly abused as a child and he had learning disabilities.   He struggled in school and had allegedly developed a relationship with a military recruiter.  Joshua got himself into trouble allegedly for stealing and having a weapon; and, he was sent away to a treatment facility for counseling. 

           In the meantime, Joshua’s grandmother had custody of him and allegedly told the Marine recruiter to take Joshua’s name off of the call list as he was “not Marine material”.   It would have been easy enough to check that out by following up with the school administrators.  Those words should have been the end of any active pursuit of Joshua, as a person to be considered as a Marine recruit.

        For a recruiter to continue to persue an individual like Joshua; it should be considered a crime.  Many special needs people would love to be in the military; however, the nature of the job requires quick thinking, reliable decision making every time, the ability to use good judgement, and, to exhibit character traits that would be of an elevated level compared to the average individual.   Some individuals able-bodied or not, no matter how how they try, are not going to be able to perform at those levels and meet those responsibilities.  It is important that those in the military be able to do so because lives depend on it!

            For many people with multiple special needs…being able to make fast, quality decisions regarding the safety and well-being of themselves, as well as others, is difficult; even under normal circumstances, but if you add into the mix, the stress and chaos of a war situation, it could be a dangerous combination.  It is heartbreaking to have someone want to serve who just may not be qualified to do so because of a physical, emotional, or developmental disability.   But encouraging that same individual to go ahead and sign up should be criminal…it is not in the best interest of that individual, the military personel who work alongside of them, or the families who love and support them, to the best of their abilities.

         It is being alleged that when Joshua got out of the facility and entered the group home; he had re-established a relationship  with the recruiter.  If it is true that the grandmother had spoken to those at the recruiting station and told them of the problems with Joshua…that should have been the end of any attempts to recruit him.   If that recruiter had the knowledge of the problems that Joshua struggled with; he should not have allowed Joshua to sign up. 

            Joshua’s grandmother had the courts approval to be his legal conservator.  Basically, meaning that he was not able to sign most legal documents because he wasn’t able to completely understand the legal consequences in doing so.   He had a low IQ, he was diagnosed as Autistic, bi-polar, asthmatic, he had learning disabilities and he had also been treated in an in-patient environment.  For all of those reasons and more…he should never have been a candidate for service in the Marine Corps. 

         Once he got to boot camp, he found himself in over his head.  He got in trouble for stealing food, for disrespecting authority, and, he was not following orders.  He told those in positions of authority that he didn’t want to be a Marine and told them of his history.  They agreed he shouldn’t be there after talking to his grandmother; but, instead of sending him home he was allowed to graduate boot camp.  Months later, he was found to have pornographic photos on his cell phone…disciplined and instructed to not do it again.   He failed and again was found to be in possession…this time with child pornography.    What he did is wrong definately, does he understand that?  That is the question…does he know what he did is wrong; and, is he capable of understanding that his actions have legal consequences?

           He was arrested and is being held on a variety of charges that he probably does not understand and is incapable of avoiding committing over and over again in the same military environment that he should never have been allowed to enter in the first place.   For heaven’s sake, this is an individual that was living in a supervised setting because of issues relating to the impulsive behaviors associated with his disabilities that didn’t allow him to live independently.  How in the world is he expected to fulfill his commitment to the military?  What will happen to Joshua and others like him?  What kind of legal discipline will he be forced to accept?  Will he be dismissed from service and returned to a supervised group home setting or will he be in the prison system?  

          While some disabilities allow individuals to perform many tasks related to military life…there is no guarantee that those are the only situations in which they will be needed to perform in.  We have to be very careful about making decisions regarding allowing those with disabilities into the military.  Their very lives could depend on it. 

           Recruiters are expected to persuade prospects to sign on the dotted line and become a member of our military service.  However, people with documented low IQ’s, learning disabilities or medical or emotional issues that would prevent them from performing their duties in a safe and timely manner should not be “encouraged to join up”.  This feels a little like it is taking advantage of someone’s lack of understanding.  It is an unfair advantage to have knowledge that they could be put into situations that are not within their capabilities of handling appropriately; and, still encourage them to join the service.

          We are in a time of war, men and women are needed to serve.  However, it is wrong to recruit people who are at a disadvantage intellectually, physically or emotionally.  This issue is going to become more of a problem because of some changes being made to the educational requirements across our nation.  Many special education students are caught between a rock and a hard place with the raising of educational requirements to graduate.  Many of them will no longer be allowed to get a diploma…they will be getting a certificate of completion instead.  Some of them will have to go to high school for 5-6 years, as the additional requirements are phased in.  This is already resulting in many students either dropping out of high school or choosing to get a GED.   Many more will try to seek a position with the military because of the lack of jobs available for special needs persons.  Just because someone is disabled or has special needs doesn’t mean that they are not patriotic; it doesn’t mean that they don’t want the respect that being in the military can give them.  Many would love an opportunity to be a hero for their country by serving.  This makes them vulnerable to outside influences when it comes to signing up.

         It is important that the Marine Corps does what is right in this situation for Joshua and others like him.   He was out of his element here; and, it should have been stopped by those in a position to do so before he ever signed on the dotted line and spent one day in boot camp.   Many eyes will be watching.  Parents, agencies, friends and educators…please be aware that your special needs students are vulnerable to the desire to serve their country.  It is admirable, but they are also vulnerable to recruiters who need to put people into the service and are more than willing to talk to your students in a way that makes them even more determined to serve; whether they are fully capable of doing the job safely, or not.

       What are your thoughts on these issues?

          It is a sad day, first Farrah Fawcett passed away this morning and now Michael Jackson has been hospitalized.  Michael was supposed to go on tour for the first time in years starting in July.   I am thinking of his children that he had with the surrogate all of those years ago; what will happen to them?  Will the birth mother have any legal standing to get custody of those children if the worst happens to Michael?   Will update soon.

Update:  Cnn says that The Associate Press and The Los Angeles Times are reporting that he has died.  Cnn has not confirmed this report.     If this is true…it is very sad indeed.  There will be many who will focus on the negative…but out of respect…lets just let the man’s passing be reflected on at this time; if it is true.  He was a gifted man musically and he has had alot of fans over the years as well as detractors. 

ABC news is also reporting that Michael Jackson has died at the age of 50.  Rest In Peace Michael.

       The family has now been ordered to have him evaluated by a doctor; to see whether he would benefit from starting chemotherapy again; if so, he WILL have to start it.  If the family does not follow through, their son could be removed from their custody.  If he would not benefit from the chemo, then the judge will allow him to opt out of treatment…but, if the doctor says that there is potential for an improvement with his cancer; then, he is to start chemo right away.  The problem is…how do the doctors enforce a patient to take treatment?  Chemo is not something that you can shove down someone’s throat…it takes time to administer.  You must have co-operation from the patient…I dont know how the court expects the medical profession to force a patient to endure all that chemotherapy entails!

         In his ruling, the judge allegedly said that, with the information provided to him…that he had sufficient evidence to over-ride the wishes of the family and their constitutional rights to freedom of religion.  With the chemotherapy,  the young man will have a 90% chance of surviving his cancer; without it…supposedly,  he would die.

          The thing is, chemotherapy is a mish- mosh of many toxic substances.  Yes, it often does kill cancer cells…but, it also kills good and healthy cells; which can cause other healh problems.   The truth is, there is no guarantee that chemotherapy will definately keep anyone alive and well.   There can be complications and serious, sometimes life threatening-side effects.  Those can be both short and long-term complications. 

           Since it is the young man who will be facing this physical, spiritual, financial, and emotional battle; why does anyone else have the right to force him to go through chemotherapy?  I understand that a judge does have legal authority…but, who felt it was their place to bring it before a judge to make that decision?   Alledgedly, it was Brown County Family services who provided the information to the judge for him to make his decision; but, I wonder who brought it to their attention?  Obviously, it was someone who disagreed with how the family was handling their son’s medical condition.

         I understand that family services around the country are formed to try and protect youth from abuse and neglect…and, that is important; but, if the young man expressed his own desire to resist having chemotherapy…why isn’t that decision being honored?   I understand that some people feel that he doesn’t understand the possible consequences of refusing medical intervention because of his age.   However,  couldn’t a medical advisor explain the options to him and make sure that his decision to stop chemo was indeed his own decision?

        It seems to me that this should be a decision that the family makes together with the advice of their doctor and religious advisors.  To have the courts step in and make the decision for them, basically alienates the authority of the parents regarding the  physical, spiritual and emotional, well-being of their child.  If the child wanted the treatments, against the parents wishes…then, I would think that that is the time for the courts to step in.  What are your thoughts, should forced chemotherapy be allowed?  What next…what other things could be forced on you medically if you are in disagreement say with your doctor, neighbor or friends?  Could you be forced to end a life if a doctor recommeded it, like in some other countries?

          The family belongs to a religious organization called, the Nemenhah Band; they believe in natural healing for those in need.   Here is their website which explains more about what they believe: http://www.nemenhah.org/.   What do you think?

        Bristol experienced a teen pregnancy, that resulted in the birth of her son Tripp, during Sarah’s campaign.  Bristol has been questioned as  a controversial role model because of her pregnancy.  She has been used as an example for both sides of the issue concerning teen pregnancy.  She is a Christian and of course, having premarital sex goes against traditional teachings.  She did, in fact, become pregnant and has been in the public limelight during that time.   She herself was not a public figure…her mother was; but, the family was put on stage during the campaign.   

           People have felt comfortable commenting on her situation; both pro and con.   Those who have supported Bristol have touted the fact that she chose to give birth to her son, as opposed to an abortion.  I too applaude that fact.  I also think that she is dealing with the reality of being a young, single mother.  She is lucky in the fact that both her parents, Sarah and Todd Palin are willing to help her out by supporting her and her son.  This is part of the equasion for many families who experience an unexpected teen pregnancy. 

          The realities are that not every teenager who finds themselves in the position of becoming a parent, at such a young age, has a stable home life; with parents who are willing to help them out and support them financially, or emotionally…let alone, enabling them to continue pursuing their education.  Many have to drop out of school to work to support their child or having to apply for financial aid through tax payer dollars.  It is a struggle in a variety of ways.   Not only are there educational concerns, financial, health, but also the social consequences; teen miss out on the carefree lifestyles that their friends are able to enjoy in their high school years once a child is born to them.

          Bristol has taken on the responsibility as a teen parent, while trying to complete her education.   During the campaign both she and her son’s father Levi Johnston were planning on getting married; they have since broken up.  In recent weeks, he has been giving interviews about private aspects of their relationship.    Bristol has said in interviews that it is best to abstain from having sex as a teen…however, she also said that it isn’t realistic.  On Good Morning America with Chris Cuomo today, she said that last comment was taken out of context.   While it is difficult to abstain, she said that there is no other way to 100% prevent pregnancy other than waiting to have sex.

        Since Bristol and Levi are no longer together, they are still trying to sort out how their relationship with one another and with their child will work.  Levi has taken his concerns and his complaints about visitation to the media.  Bristol’s family has set some guidelines about how that should happen; such as visiting with Tripp at the Palin’s home.  Levi has allegedly struggled with continuing his education and with employment issues as well as some potential legal issues regarding his mother-allegedly being arrested for drug charges. 

        As tragic as this family drama appears to be in some ways, they will find their way.  People around the world struggle with the same issues of visitation, custody, support, education, living conditions, financial stability…and developing and maintaining relationships. 

        While life conditions continue to change, as is normal in the life of a person coming out of their teen years into adulthood, they will have to adjust their expectations and responsibilities while they attempt to meet their own needs and that of their child.  Sometimes teen parents stay together and form a family that lives and grows together…others seperate and form lives seperate from each other.    New romantic and personal relationships are formed and must be adjusted to as potential parental figures come into the life of a child of teen parents.  These difficulties can be overcome and can be turned into a good solid foundational family system that works…but, it is something that must be continually encouraged for the well- being of everyone involved.  Of course, if teen pregnancy can be prevented this would be better for everyone involved.

          The Candies Foundation was formed back in June 2001.  They have used ambassadors who are popular and in the public eye.  I do think that they should make deliberate choices of people who dont promote sensual or sexualized images in their work outside of the Candies Foundation, since it is working towards preventing teen pregnancies.  To me, using people who have careers in the public eye who use some form of sensual/sexual appeal, such as in the music industry, movies or television, comes across as sending mixed messages.    The persuasive power that celebrity role models have on the teen population has a big impact on the behaviors of teens as they are growing up.

         I am sure there will continue to be controversy surrounding Bristol Palin’s choices, as she puts herself in this platform for public discussion on preventing teen pregnancies.   I hope that people remember not to try to politicize this issue; as the goal to prevent teen pregnancy should be across the board no matter what someone’s political views are.    I do think that it is admirable that she is tying to make something positive happen from her situation.   The real issue is though; whether teens will listen to and respect her viewpoint regarding their own choices about becoming sexually active.   What do you think?

Redmond has been sitting in jail awaiting court proceedings because of drug charges.  It is alleged that he was arrested for heroin possession at a jail facility where he was picking up/dropping off a friend.  He goes to court this week; but prior to that…this past Saturday, a judge allowed a three hour visit with his mother, Farrah who is ill.  It is possible that Redmond will be allowed to go back into rehab.  It is being said, that those in custody, in jail, are occasionally allowed supervised visits when a family member is seriously ill, or when there is a death in the family.  Spokespersons are saying that Farrah is no worse  health-wise, then when she was hospitalized in recent weeks.

My feeling is that this visit was allowed because whether Redmond is allowed back into rehab, or he is sentenced to more jail time for possession of drugs…he would be housed further away from his ill mother; making visiting her difficult, should her circumstances change during that time.

I wonder, how bittersweet was the moment of the visit.  Surely, Farrah was thrilled to see her son…filled with love and affection; as well as parental concern about his future.  On Redmond’s thoughts you have to wonder…does he understand the weight of the worry that his mother bears about his future?  This has to be extra ordinarily difficult for her; to continue her fight against this disease and, to not be able to physically stand alongside of her child to help him battle his alleged addictions.

The bonds of mother and child are a legendary thing.  Can she communicate how important his well-being is to her?  Will he be able to gain the upper hand in his  alleged struggles with drugs?  Will his battle take him away from his mother when she needs him most?  Redmond is her only birth child…she does have step children with Ryan O’Neal; but, if the media has correctly portrayed the family situation; family relationships are strained with Ryan’s children.  This family is a family filled with talented and passionate people, but they have struggled over the years; the O’Neals have had their public battles; custody issues, divorce, drugs, violence and anger issues.   Celebrity brings public awareness to some of the same issues that plague non-famous families around the world.  Often it is harder to heal those hurts when in the public eye.

The media has sent mixed messages to the public about Farrah’s medical condition.  It is all beside the point; she is definately a fighter.  I can only imagine how difficult that visit must have been…to only have three hours in which to squeeze in the transportation to and from the visit…and have so little time to actually talk and spend quality time together.  There was no time to waste on things of little importance.   One hopes that this is not the last visit that they are able to have with one another.  Addictions are a terrible thing; so is cancer…they both destroy if they go unchecked.  Let’s hope that there is long term healing in store for them both…mother and child.