The National Night Out campaign strives to bring a focus on the awareness of drug & crime prevention efforts, to strengthen the collective power of neighborhood watches and the role of police and community programs to build up anti-crime programs to protect local communities.  It is high time that the criminal element recognize the fact that law abiding citizens are sick and tired of being held hostage to those who have little regard for the safety and well-being of others.

Tonight is the night that many communities will hold events to support efforts to be aware of neighborhood crimes, to report suspicious activities and to recognize the fact that individuals have the power to change negative behaviors that affect whole communities by being mor pro-active in their own local areas by helping to fight back through a partnership with law enforcement to take back the streets to make them safer for friends, neighbors and families.   If you would like to find out more about National Night Out activities…check out their site here: http://www.nationalnightout.org/nno/

Many of the comments that I overheard were negative and directed at my daughter.  All three girls have dominant personalities but what I was getting a glimpse of was what you would call verbal bullying.  Early the next day we had activities to go to so I wasn’t hearing much but I didn’t like some of what I did hear.   Even more importantly, when negative comments were made regarding my daughter she did not speak up or against what was being said.

When I would hear the tone of voice or the partial conversations that made me go…ummm what was that you said; all I got for clarification was , “oh nothing, never mind”.  That only made me listen closer.

So it was on the drive delivering the girls to their home that I was in a better position to hear clearly a couple of comments that I felt were so outrageous and disrespect or demeaning that I had to address it.  Now, understand…these girls weren’t purposely trying to be cruel.

I feel that they were more unaware of what they were doing…and yet, it had to be talked about.  I expressed to them that friends did not speak that way to one another.  Friendship I said can last a lifetime if the people involved take the time to care for one another, support and encourage one another.   I said that there are enough people in this world ready, willing and able to tear you down, make fun of you, disrespect you and try to make you feel small.  I said that it was unacceptable for them to speak to one another that way.  It had to stop.  That it was unhealthy.

My concern was two fold…one that my daughter’s self-esteem not be damaged by “friends” whose opinions mean a great deal to my daughter and two that her friends understand that this kind of behavior was not only not healthy but would not be tolerated.  Those girls as well as my daughter needed to understand that self esteem and relationships go hand in hand and that they form at a young age how we allow ourselves to be treated in future relationships.

A damaged self esteem sets up individuals for entering into abusive relationships.  An individual who abuses others in a relationship often end up in very unhealthy relationships later in life as well.   I don’t want any of either of those types of relationships for these three young ladies.

People who are involved in dysfunctional relationships are often caught up in depression, drugs/alcohol abuse, violence, pre-marital sex at a young age and even teen pregnancies.  The prison systems are full of abandoned individuals who’ve gotten involved in the wrong things; because they didn’t develop healthy foundations, in their own minds, about who they are and what they deserve in life.  Too often people are told they are no good and they don’t deserve anything but emotional crumbs in their day to day lives; and it isn’t true.  Life is too short to be broken, angry, hurt and miserable.  Everyone has the right to grow up believing that they deserve the best life has to offer.

Today it seems that people just don’t know how to support one another or relate to each other in a positive way.  The world has become very negative and toxic.  Many people only concern themselves with getting their own needs met and often times they do that at the expense of others.  We need to find ways to build people up, support them, encourage them and help them to grow in positive ways.

Parents, teachers, siblings, friends and clergy need to keep tuned into the people involved in relationships with the people that they love.  Listen closely to how they speak to one another, how they treat one another and how they allow others to treat them as well.  Building healthy interactions between those we are in charge over is important.  Do you have any tips to help someone in this type of situation?

However, there are products being labeled as “bath salts” that are powders packed in small tea bag sized envelopes and advertised as legal substitutions; merely to make money.  They are  being sold on the shelves of convience stores, truck stops and head shops all around the country; as well as online.  They are marketed as bath salts, when those who produce these products know full well that they are not being used for that purpose.

Those who produce, market or sell these items should be held accountable for those who have had their lives destroyed by their products. Their intended use is for individuals who are looking for a drug induced high.  Business selling them should be forced to removed them from their stores in my opinion.  In fact, some states & communities are banning their sales…but, we need to increase awareness of this issue; before the use of these products becomes more widespread.

The powders are snorted, smoked or injected.  This product is equal in intensity to meth in it’s effects on the human body and mind.  It can be addictive even when the user experiences terrible effects during usage.  Some people have committed murder, attempted suicide or just gone on a violent, destructive bender while using these products.  Emergency rooms, police and poison control centers are seeing an increase in calls in areas where these products are being sold.

Children and adults can purchase a package of “bath salts” for approximately $20 or so.  Unfortunately these things can be purchased online too.  A parent seeing one of these packages may not realize that it is a drug with very harmful effects.  These products have names like Cosmic blast, Vanilla Sky, Red Dove, White Lightning, Hurricane Charlie, and Bliss or Ivory Wave…they sound like a generic aromatherapy type of product; these packages are anything but.  It is un-believable that this product is allowed to be sold; knowing that lives are being ruined.  These legal substitutes are chemical stimulants designed to achieve a physical/psychological high and are extremely deadly.  They have strong stimulants inside the packages which closely copy the effects on the body like speed or ephedra.

The problem is that these legal substitutes are not something that the DEA regulates.  However, the damage these drugs do is causes dangerous reactions that often produce paranoia, violence and psychological terror that can not only endanger the user (who willingly takes that chance); but also affects anyone who is unfortunate enough to run into someone under the influence of such an un-predictable drug.

Some people abusing these bath salts, have described seeing visions of, aliens, devils or demons and attacking themselves or others because of those visions.  If you see this stuff being sold…report it to the authorities.  If you know someone using these products get them help immediately; report it to a poison control center and get them in to see medical personnel right away before they harm themselves or someone else.  Schools should be prepared for the influence of these products as well by having drug counselors on speed dial.  Educating individuals who are susceptible to the influence of using drugs to escape reality is going to be very important as this trend becomes more commonly known.   Becoming aware of this trend of abusing bath salts could help you spot the danger and help to save  lives.

With the economic disasters of the last decade, there are more people out on the street because they have been uprooted by a sudden change in their finances.  Military veterans often struggle with a return to civilian life and end up homeless.   Runaways also can end up homeless after they have run through the willingness of their friends and family to allow them to couch surf for a period of time.  Sometimes a runaway situation is by choice and sometimes it is out of a need for survival that they leave home.   Again, people become homeless for a variety of reasons; and, it doesn’t have to be a permanent situation.  People living on the street can also become a victim of violence, crime, or intimidation.   Homelessness can be a reaction to a temporary situation in a person’s life.   It does not have to mean a hopeless situation.

Ted Williams says that for the better part of 15 years he was homeless and living on the streets because of his addictions.  Turning his life around and getting sober allowed him to have  a dream.   Growing up he had a desire to get into broadcasting for a career.  The addictions took him on another path.  Recently, he stood along the roadway with a handwritten sign proclaiming that he had a God given voice.  A video was made of him by a reporter as he panhandled alongside the road; that video of him using his God given voice went viral.  Since that time, he has had a whirlwind couple of days with job offers inundating him.  He has the potential of seeing his aging mother who lives in Brooklyn, New York while he is doing all of these interviews with the major news networks.  This opportunity to reconnect mother and son is an answer to both of their prayers.  They both have said that they prayed to see him doing well again in life before she passed away. Their faith was rewarded by this reaction to the viral video.

I am sure that there are families all around the country with that same desire; to see their sons/daughters/fathers/mothers restored to a good place in life.  This feel good story of Ted Williams could be true for many more people who are homeless.  Ted has had an offer to work for the Cleveland Cavaliers and have a home again.  How many other people that are presently homeless have hopes and dreams that could come true if someone took notice of them on the street and didn’t dismiss them as hopeless?  it would be great if all of these opportunities being offered to Ted could be spread around to help others in the same situation.

Don’t get me wrong…I love this story about Ted Williams.  I am happy for him and his family.  I just can’t help thinking about the countless others who are still stuck on the street; caught up in drugs, alcohol, prostitution/human trafficking, or in an emotional/physical prison.   Illegal activities often become a way of life when there is no steady income from a job.   We need to focus some solutions to the problem on helping people to turn their lives around and become happy, healthy and productive individuals again.  Look at what a little positive attention has done for Ted Williams and imagine the same effect on those that you pass on the street in the same predicament any other day of the week.   How can you help?  Donate time, food, blankets, money or your skills to those who work with the homeless.  Employ them or help to educate someone; direct them to a safe shelter or to a counseling program which may be able to help them get back on their feet.  Try to shed a little light into the dark corners of the world where people don’t often feel worthy of a better life!

        That is fine and good…even an interesting social experiment if you ask me.  However, recently some of these flash mobs have turned towards destructive behaviors such as blocking traffic, walking streets and smashing windows, climbing on vehicles and scaring tourists and community members. 

          Many of these flash mobs are being organized with text messages, online social media sites like Twitter and Facebook as well as others.   Even in the best of circumstances, an event that is organized like this has the potential to go from good to bad at a moment’s notice. 

           However, my feeling is that depending on what the original intent of the coming together of large groups of young people; it is imperitive that they maintain a clear head and think for themselves.   If the “invitation” to come together is for a theme or idea of something good and pure…then by all means, go with the best of intentions.  Do good.  Have fun.   Enjoy!  However, be responsible for yourself and your actions.  If things start to go badly…use that technology or social media to notify authorities.  Don’t join in illegal, immoral, or destructive behaviors.

       If that “invitation” for a flash mob or group activity starts out with some destructive purpose…be responsible; don’t join in, and please, notify the authorities about what you have seen or heard.  Don’t take the pathway of “It is not my responsibility to do anything about it”.  If you “know” about it…you have a responsibility to report it, in my opinion.  You could be instrumental in preventing a tragedy, or violence or some kind of related damage to an event that never had the potential of being a positive event in the first place.

        Thinking for oneself is critical to keeping people on a positive moral track.  It can help prevent a person from being caught up in that group mentality that can have long term legal, moral,physical, spiritual and emotional consequences.

         Instilling a strong sense of values and personal responsibility in children is the best way to avoid raising up young adults who will diregard the safety and well-being of others or in other words desensitizing them to doing what is the right thing to do in any given circumstance.

          Any time we try to persuade someone to go along with the crowd, without thinking that action through, weighing the pros and cons of taking such an action; it is wrong.  

           I happen to love social media, the immediacy of the technological world that we live in…but like anything in our environment it can be perverted or used for selfish intent.   Teaching our young people to think for themselves, to consider any consequences of their actions before they choose to follow the crowd can make for stronger individuals and promote a life of keen decision making.   Believe it or not, it can also be a shot in the arm at preventing crime or illegal activities that can negatively impact our families, our communities, businesses, and our schools.

           Parents, friends, neighbors, clergy, teachers…authority figures of any description need to inspire our youth to live and breathe independent thinking; combined with responsibility and caring action.  If you see someone who is being be-littled or bullied by others, or being controlled by stronger willed personalities in their lives…encourage them to stand true to themselves and the values that they believe it.  Teach them it is ok to do the right thing- teach them to recognize what IS the right thing.   In fact, live that life yourself and be an inspiration; simply by the way you live your own life. 

        This was illustrated very clearly to many this past month when a young 13 old girl was given in marriage to a 23 year old Yemeni man.  He and his in-laws allegedly arranged a sort of deal for him to be given the 13 yr old bride and for his brother in law to be given HIS sister in marriage to avoid the high cost of a bride price.  According to the new pieces i have seen, it appears that the 13 year old bride was not only a reluctant bride when it came to sexual relations…the groom supposedly took her to a clinic to allegedly get medicated to render her helpless to resist his advances. 

        When the clinic denied him…he supposedly took her home and somehow was able to get himself a type of male enhancement drug to help him perform the sexual act because he was having trouble having intercourse.  The young girls mother says that her daughter told her in the hospital shortly before she died that her husband tied her up and raped and sodomized her.  This after he had already allegedly forced her to have sex and caused her internal injuries that required a trip back to that clinic.

       The news pieces said that they adviced the husband to avoid having relations with his wife for approximately 10 days.  He had carried her into the clinic because she could not walk.  The injuries evidently became more life threatening after he allegedly returned home and continued having sex.   The young girl was admitted to the hospital days after the wedding, where she died from ruptured reproductive organs.  Her mother says she appeared as if she had been butchered.  How do you look your child in the eye and know that what had been done to them will result in their death and you were powerless to change the outcome? 

         It is hard to think of a human being abusing someone so callously, as to think of their sexual needs exclusively to the well-being of the other person, outside of a predator or rapist who attacks another person purely for this purpose.    I am sure that the young brides family had no idea that her husband could be capable of such treatment of their daughter or they may not have agreed to the marriage arrangement…yet, this is what happened.  It is a tragedy.

        Not only was her body and spirit abused…but she was not protected in any way from a further sexual assault on her body once she was brought into the clinic the first time.   She was a 13 year old girl and she had to have been fearful.   She suffered greatly and lost her life simply because she was female and vulnerable to her situation because of where she was born and  into a culture which allows such things to happen to those unfortunate enough to be in her position. 

         Just today, there was another news piece about another girl; an 11 year old child.  She was also allegedly hospitalized with damage to her genitals.  She too was a child bride; this is unacceptable. 

          It is a human rights issue.  Poverty and ignorance are no excuse for these situations to continue.  Families have to protect their children from the potential of this kind of treatment by not giving children in marriage.  It is wrong to subject them to the sexual torture of their bodies and possible pregnancies… to protect them even from a potential death from young bodies that strain to give birth when they are yet barely matured to the point of conceiving a child in the first place; and truly, some of them are not even that physically mature.

         There are some people and cultures that believe marrying children off before they are considered adults will help to avoid premature sexual activity.  While it might prevent them from having sex before they are married…it in no way guarantees that they will not have sex until they are an adult; willingly or by force.   Because, there is no way to insure that once a child is legally, morally, or spiritually entered into a marriage that the adult partner won’t try to enforce a sexual relationship with that child. 

         Empoverished nations must be given alternatives to joining children in marriage to adults as a means of relieving financial burdens upon their families.  Educating people to the use of birth control to help reduce the number of children born to impoverished parents would be helpful.  Creating an awareness program about the dangers of forced sexual activity upon the bodies of children.  Holding offenders legally responsible for death or for damage caused to the children that this happens to; making it a crime to harm a child in this way.  

          Creating a means of earning a higher wage for families in those areas where these kind of arrangements take place;  so that they don’t see the need to marry off their children while they are still yet children.  How horrible to have such a situation within your own family or circle of acquaintance.   No caring parent would want to have to live with such an outcome on their conscience.  I hope that those who have a voice and have power will find the courage to change the way things are so that no family has to live with the knowledge that they have failed to protect their child from such a tragedy.  

            It makes me angry, and it makes me sad that people who are in the position of stopping this abuse of children do not; we must demand accountability and responsibility of our leaders, our religious counselors, law makers and our own family members!

When a young person, no matter how troubled, crosses your path and you have the chance to positively impact their life…take it from me..you need to be bold, by doing or saying what needs to be said or done.  What you think may annoy them or offend is not as important as avoiding a potential event if that person has time to think through the things that they are doing with their life.

Not so long ago, such an opportunity came and went.  Several of us tried to touch the lives of the young men who momentarily passed through our youth group.  They had varying degrees of response to the spiritual teachings and to the adults trying to make a connection with them.  One young man was a rubber ball; oh he came back a few times…but he wasn’t there for spiritual guidance.  He appeared to be there for social reasons. 

That isn’t terribly unusual.  What is unusual is that there seemed to be little to no positive impact on his life; his heart was not about to let anyone in deep enough to touch him spiritually or emotionally.  Everything was funny to him or made him angry.  He did not respect authority nor did he appear to have a good relationship with any of the other teens in attendance, even though he went to school with them.

In fact, he seemed to flaunt his defiance and rebellion.   He instilled fear in some of the kids because of his actions and his attitude.  He threatened some, he disobeyed requests to respect bare minimum requests for appropriate behavior.  Mostly, he just put in a couple of  appearances and left the place “untouched or unchanged”.

One of the other two that came was a bit older.   This young man knew scripture and could quote it.  I had no knowledge of this person before he came to visit, the one and only time that he came to the youth group.  However, others knew of him.  He freely admitted that he was not living right (even though his family had taught him about God and living according to his guidelines).  This made me sad; yet, I was hopeful because he seemed to have a foot on both sides of the fence.  He was young, intelligent and had the capability of making the right choice.

Do not be fooled…people can’t live that way indefinitely; eventually, you must get off of the fence and make a choice on how you conduct yourself in life.   It comes down to a choice of living in a Godly way or choosing to do whatever you want regardless of the consequences.   Of course the news story has not yet been tried in court; so we do not know if what is being charged to these young people, is in fact what happened beyond a shadow of a doubt.   However, these young men that visited our youth group are now being charged with a murder.

Initially, as I said the younger man was totally defiant and the first one seemed to be trying to choose which way he was going to go.  I had hoped that he would choose the correct path.  His family I am sure was praying for the same outcome.  They both had been in trouble with the law before and were on probation, they said.  Drugs & alcohol appeared to be a part of the problem.  The older one seemed to be trying to come to terms with how he was going to go forward while on probation; while the other was mocking the system and made light of all of the wrongs they had done previously.  That never bodes well for anyone…to have an experience that is meant to teach us a lesson and to laugh in the face of it. 

While I know that everyone make mistakes; some people turn their lives around and others do not.  What makes the difference???  I don’t know, I wish that I did.   Many lives could be kept from making tragic mistakes that have huge and horrific consequences, if only someone had the answer to that question.

We always tell our teens that God is there; and he is.  He knocks and waits for a person to answer the door.  He patiently and lovingly keeps an eye on you and keeps trying to call your name so that your life is one of purpose and value.  One that is full of promise and hope.  He forgives mistakes and he wants for you to turn to him before life gets out of control; as long as the person truly is sorry for their mistakes and makes an effort to learn from it, when they ask God to forgive he does.  

Even when we make mistakes God never leaves us; he will be there when we need to pick up the tattered remains of our lives.  It is not too late for these young men (or anyone) to ask God to be the ruler of their lives.  It won’t undo the loss of  life, if they were indeed responsible for this person’s death.  However, God can make good come from any evil act or darkness in a person’s life.

Still, let’s not forget that justice will be served.  Forgiveness does not entitle anyone to be exempt from punishment.  There are c0nsequences to our actions…both good and bad.  It is hard to hear but it is a fact of life.

A life was lost and it cannot be returned.   That person’s family and friends will want justice…some will even want revenge.  Things do not have to be this way, a person’s future if you are convicted, is not one of freedom of choice.  It seems such a waste to have a whole life before you, only to throw it away; and for what reason?  A party, a moment of rebellion, a reckless decision, a fleeting moment of pleasure?  A choice that sometimes has a high price for the decision maker; care must be taken not to make choices that will waste the time we have here with our friends and family. 

 The victim had friends and family too, and they will be grieving.   Young men did you take this person’s life?  I don’t know.  But still i wonder, why didn’t you hear him when God called your name?  Or if you heard him, why didn’t you respond in a way that allowed God to be present in your daily life?  If you did, then the murder victim would still be alive, your family would not be facing a life without you in it on a daily basis, you would not be sitting in prison, when instead, you could be having a life full of all of the good things that God intended for you.

Why was your rebellion (of choosing drugs and violence) so much more important than choosing a life of right?  Why is it that the things God meant for you to hear fell away from you like water off of a ducks back?  Having rules and guidelines in life helps keep us accountable and out of situations that can destroy us.  Having parents, teachers, law enforcement, bus drivers etc who give you boundaries to follow aren’t doing it to make your life miserable; in fact, it is just the opposite, they care enough to tell you when you have crossed a line of inappropriate behavior, to help you do what is right.  It really is for your own good and the good of others.

Even though you were not a part of our youth group, on a permanent basis, I grieve that you have been accused of this murder.  I am sad that it is even a possibility that it could be true.  I am heartbroken for the victim’s friends and family.  I am horrified that the victim died a needless death full of pain, only to be discarded like something left behind that had no value.

Our world is becoming too full of these kinds of stories.   Stories filled with a lack of respect for others, violence, lack of accountability, a sense of entitlement, drugs/alcohol, low self-esteem, death, rape, anger, loneliness, sadness, abuse, lack of education, jail/prison, isolation, and so many other negative things that are harmful to our society.  There are too many lives that are destroyed by those who can’t or won’t respect authority and the rules of society; at home, in school, at church, on the streets or in any other environment.  There are too many innocent people who have to suffer from the negative choices that others make.   If we all tried to follow the rules that God set before us then there would be so much less suffering in the world.

My heart wonders if you have had time yet to wish that you had heard God when he called your name.  How many others will find themselves in situations of their own making because they have chosen to rebel and ignore the concerns of their loved ones?  How can we keep those we care about from making choices that harm themselves or others when they are living outside of God’s protection?  What can we learn from these horrible stories?

Bullying is more complicated these days because of the way in which it is done; it is psychological, it is persistent, and it can include threats, violence, or even sexual threats.  Most people over the age of 40 remember the school bully…you know the one.  He/She was the person who everyone feared and gave a wide berth to just because he sought out and picked on those he/she knew for a fact that they could take on and win.  We all have had some relationship to that kind of person.   However, now it seems that there is a group mentality when bullying or persistent harassment starts up.

  Back when i was growing up you had one of two options…ignore that person and stay far away from them or “stand up to them” and work up your courage to go toe to toe.  Remember the childhood phrase that we were all taught…sticks and stones will break your bones but words will never hurt you?  That couldn’t be farther from the truth; we all know that words have the power to destroy a person’s self-worth and the value of that person in the eyes of others.

Everyday it seems that we hear about another child/teen/college student that has been bullied or cyber stalked and trash talked about.  Many of those cases either end in a suicide or a violent attack or even in some cases of extreme bullying…a retribution plan of attack on a school with a violent outburst.  Lives are ruined, hearts and minds are damaged; many individuals end up in prison because of bullying.

 A real danger is people who think that bullying is a normal part of growing up…it isn’t and it should not ever be allowed.  Making excuses and telling a victim of such behavior to just ignore it is equal to nullifying their experience with bullying…which in effect tells them that they are powerless to change their circumstance in a positive way.

There is a hopelessness about our young people.   Many of them, in a desperate need to feel something, are self mutilating, becoming promiscuous,  developing eating disorders, or diving into the world of drug/alcohol addictions in reaction to their feelings about themselves and their lack of proper treatment by others.   They have been conditioned to think that nothing is going to change for the better; so they feel angry, bitter, broken and depressed.

 Don’t fool yourself into thinking that it doesn’t affect you, your children, your grandchildren, or the children in your church or neighborhood.  It does; and things are getting desperate.  Kids feel threatened, they feel demeaned and they feel powerless…so, many of them will arm themselves and things escalate quickly.   This is good for no one.

Respect for themselves as well as others is important to fight bullying.  Finding mentors for our young people is helpful…getting involved in sports or extra curricular activities that give them an appropriate sense of pride in themselves and their involvement.  Community service that gives them a sense of personal value and connects them to others who recognize their strengths and talents.  Inspiring hope and promise for a future is what kids need.  Instead, we often find that our young people aren’t getting those important messages about themselves.

With all of the new technology, kids are able to be “connected” 24 hours a day to not only their friends; but also, to people who wish them harm.  This connection includes cell phones, cell phone pictures, texts, email, chat lines, websites and forums.   Kids live in the midst of a multi-media blitz in their lives in school and at home.  Pay attention to them closely; watch for any changes in behavior, attitude, relationships and moods.  It could be life and death-for them and anyone who is in their lives, personally and socially.

Don’t think, not my child, not my child’s friend or the kids in my youth group.  I’ve worked with kids most of my adult life; for well over 30 years and things have broken down.  Kids, even good ones have low self esteem, they are depressed, frightened and angry.   Many of them don’t feel loved (even when they are), they don’t feel valued, appreciated or listened to.  They feel trapped and alone or isolated…even when they are surrounded by friends and activities.  It is a recipe for disaster not to recognize the patterns or seeds of destruction.

In truth, it makes you want to build a fortress around them to protect them against those who seek them out to do them harm.  So what can a parent, an educator, a spiritual leader, a friend, or a sibling do to help those caught in the web of persistent bullying/stalking?

First of all, pay attention.  Listen closely, monitor things…set limits of exposure online.  Talk to them and their friends about situations of bullying in their school or social networks.  Document any kind of negative interaction…write it down, talk to the school administration, file a report, alert teachers, bus drivers, neighborhood watches to any kind of bullying or violent situations that may come up.  Create a network of awareness and prevention where you can.  Ask your school to bring in safety experts and relationship experts who are trained in these areas of concern. 

Expect there to be resistence from the powers that be.  Many of them will give lip service to the no tolerance rule of bullying…but never, EVER, let them talk you out of filing official reports or grievances.   Often a school will just expell a student for a short time as a discipline…never following up with corrective action such as counseling or conflict resolution.   Leadership must establish methods of dealing with this type of behavior in a constructive way. 

For the victims of bullying or school violence… it may be helpful to have some self-defense training, some skilled training about paying attention to their surroundings and who is in their direct physical environment; making judgement calls about making decisions about where to go and with whom.   Get restraining orders or personal orders of protection if you feel it is something necessary to the physical and emotional well-being of the victim.     In some cases, change schools or even in extreme cases…it is best to even move or send them to live with a relative temporarily-especially if there is gang involvement.   This is no small thing to overcome and you do not want a victim of bullying/violence to become a prisoner to fear in their everyday life.

Does that sound like an over-reaction?  I can assure you that it is not; don’t believe me?  Watch the news, listen to a mother or a father that has lost a child to school violence or bullying; they would do anything if they could go back and do something different.   Or maybe listen to the child who in reaction to the bullying, who took matters into his/her own hands and tried to retaliate only to end up in prison for years or for life.  That ought to convince you that taking drastic measures to protect your child or your family is a good thing.  You see, persistent bullying often spreads and becomes a contagious thing…affecting other family members or sometimes even others in the neighborhood.   It is serious, but things can be done to improve the situation; get good advice from law enforcement or safety experts on the matter.

Ok, remember that I mentioned that some of you wouldn’t make it this far because you think it doesn’t affect you.  These young people who are traumatized, or trained to protect themselves emotionally by closing off normal pathways of emotion, are going to grow up.  They are going to become doctors, lawyers, nurses, teachers and nursing home supervisors, counselors and so on.

If their standards of what is acceptable, in relation to inappropriate levels of behavior have been damaged, are you going to want them caring for your grandchildren in day care, or taking care of one of your loved ones in a hospital or nursing home setting?  If they have learned to accept that kind of treatment in their own life, they surely won’t recognize it as inappropriate behavior in relation to others like yourself.  

Please, love on the youth today build them up and help them to be strong individuals in a healthy way; care for them, listen to them, protect them through legal channels and through school policies.  You won’t regret being proactive in the name of what is right!

         It got me to wondering what it is about heros that attracts us to them; what are they made of.   Why do heros do the things that they do?  Most of the time heros are fighting for justice, in other words fighting against the bad guys/gals, trying to protect other everyday non-heros from harm.  I think as we grow up, our understanding of what a hero is changes a bit.  I think we are attracted to the goodness in a hero or their ability to protect and to serve.  It is admirable and desirable to be capable of doing the right thing, for the right reason.

          In my mind, a hero is someone who does something unexpected in a challenging way that helps/protects/inspires/encourages another person who is not in a position to do it for themselves at the time.   A hero is someone who makes a split second decision to reach out and make a difference even if the cost is high-such as a stranger who rushes to protect another person from a crime, a threat, a bad decision, or a moment of danger.

           Sometimes a hero is a person who is “just doing their job” in their own words; but to another ordinary person their commitment to the deed is extra-ordinary because of the level of commitment to performing the deed comes with high risk or a high cost to the person choosing to take action.  A police officer, a fireman/woman, a postal worker, a teacher, a store clerk, military men and women…the list goes on and on; these people are heros in my book. 

           What about the volunteer or caregiver who takes extra measure to seek a solution to another person in need?  Are they a hero?   What about people who put themselves out on the front line to fight for what they believe in even when it is not popular; are they heros?  I believe that they are.

            I think about those people who fight for the poor, aged, disabled, ill, those who wage a war against cancer, domestic violence, drug & alcohol addictions, human trafficking, homelessness, abortion, abuse/neglect, children without families or without basic needs being met.  The people who champion for an awareness or for changes to existing circumstances just because it is the right thing to do…I believe these people are heros.  They are an inspiration!

           Miep Gies died yesterday at age 100.  She was a hero but she didn’t like to think of herself that way.  She was an office worker in the employ of Anne Frank’s father Otto Frank; she hid Anne Frank and her family and friends in a secret room in a warehouse during the years that Hitler was rounding up Jews to kill them, during the Holocaust.  She is the woman who bicycled around the city finding food to feed them, and who eventually found the pages of Anne Frank’s diary when they were arrested.  She risked her own life to do what was the right thing to do to protect other human beings in extra-ordinary difficult circumstances.

             There are so many different kinds of heros in our every day lives if only we stop to think about it.  I think the act of a hero is a call from God to step outside of ourselves to be the hands and feet of Jesus…to be the best person that we can be.

           Do you know someone like this?  Write me a comment and give them a little plug.  Most heros are unsung heros because they don’t believe that they deserve attention for doing what they consider the right thing to do.  And, maybe in one sense they don’t…because we should all be doing these things…but the truth of the matter is, that without examples how will others learn to be heros in their own right?  We must hold up examples of special people who do acts of heroism…because in doing that we are encouraging more of that kind of behavior. 

So is there a hero that you know of doing something wonderful?   What is your hero made of…tell us all about them.  Please comment here and let us know about this person and what they are doing to make the world a better place!  Thanks for being a light!

        Human trafficking or modern day slavery is nothing new unfortunately…it has been in existence since the beginning of time documented in the Bible even.  It is a horrible way to live and it is dehumanizing.  It must stop.  No one should own, buy, or sell another human being for sexual purposes or any other purpose.  Help to spread the awareness of it.  Help to educate people that even joking about or ignoring the prostitute on the street is ignorance of the fact that they may not be prostituting themselves willingly.  They may be a victim of human trafficking/modern slavery. 

        For those people who patronize prostitute, men or women, you may not only be guilty of illegal activity, immoral activity; but, also of an inhuman indecency by subjecting another human being to dehumanizing behavior.  There is a growing trend to visit other countries with the intent of sexual tourism…meaning going to other countries with the intention of using other people for their sexual pleasure.   

        Speak up, speak out tell someone that it is wrong….help someone who needs help by lending a hand to those who are homeless and on the streets, runaways who are vulnerable to those who prey on individuals who appear to be fragile and without a friend, with no one to turn to.  Get involved and call the authorities, talk to teens and tell them of the dangers.

         People disappear every day on the streets of America and all around the world; this includes men, women, teens, and children.  Where do they go, many individuals are never heard from again.  Those that are found and rescued have horrible tales to tell.  A life time of scars and emotional, physical, psychological, spiritual, and sexual healing to do. 

          Believe it or not, but there are actual networks of predators who buy/sell/trade human beings from one area to another all around the world.  Some individuals actually take vacations to other countries to take advantage of those in sexual servitude.  Speak out against such practices.  For updates on this subject and more please visit:  http://www.humantrafficking.org/updates/869